Again, With the Punching in the Face Thing

AND, the fisting of the hands.

What is this among female fantasy YA writers and their female readers, the "punch in the face" and the "fisting of the hands?"

What am I missing? Is this contributing to my growing dislike of the sound of the current crop of narrator-protag's first person pov's voices in YA fiction?

Additionally, keep in mind that for this reader, the usage of 'turned on his / her heel' is exceedingly annoying as well, and throws me out of disbelief suspension every time it is used.

A description of the color and expression of eyes by protagonist from across a room also -- as well as running, running, running while talking talking, talking for hours, days, weeks -- for all we know, considering the length of the book, for YEARS -- without sleeping, drinking, eating or peeing -- talking always about how sexy this one is, and how beautifully dressed, and how this and how that, on every page, while falling down the rabbit hole, and how unspecial "I" (protagonist) is and don't seek attention to ourselves, while narrating on every page how special, how attractive, how sexy -- too sexy we are for our shirts, every one us in this special way! protagonist(s) Is(Are), Really, and special in that speshul snowflake way, in fact, while loudly proclaiming we are not, indeed Speshul Snowflakes, in the attempt to snow the reader -- and this while supposedly life-threatening events are occuring! And at least another new character -- often several! -- introduced per page, and then we never see them again.

Again I ask:  What is it I'm missing about living in the book reading-buying sector of the U.S.A. population about how to write fantasy fiction if you are female and attempting to appeal to the female audience these days?  Because, I'm not getting any of this!  To me it seems like bad writing.